Ex-Girlfriend – You're Married. Your Ex Girlfriend Is Nearby. What Next?

Your ex-girlfriend is in the neighborhood. Already you're married and have a happy home. Is there any room for your ex girlfriend?

The answer is emphatic no.

That answer is short and straight to the point. Well, let me explain.

Marriage is a different ball game. When you get married you commit to one person and one person alone. This person is your wife. There is no room for second thoughts. On the other hand, your ex-girlfriend is someone with whom you once had a relationship but somehow things didn't quite go beyond just friendship. When you run into your ex girlfriend, familiarity wells up.

You exchange pleasantries. You try to catch up on lost ground.

But wait. Do not forget you're now married.

Old friendships once revived can begin to grow in unexpected directions. This is not some false alarm. It has been proven true again and again.

Consider Marie's case.

She got married and had two kids for David her beloved husband. After her second baby, she decided to go back to school for her masters degree program.

Unfortunately, the university where she was admitted was in another city, which was some two hour drive away. She got her husband's consent and started the program.

She would stay in the city for the program Monday to Friday and return home to her family on Friday evening. She spent her weekends with her family and returned to school Monday morning.

It was stressful for the family but she was determined to finish her program. The least her husband could do was support her.

Mid-way into the program, her husband stumbled on his ex-girlfriend, Vanessa.

Vanessa and David had a great relationship once and actually planned to get married. However, his parents raised objections over Vanessa and he had to drop the relationship.

Nevertheless, his love for her wasn't completely dead.

It was a great relief to see her again. She was still not married. She said she couldn't find anyone to replace David.

David felt genuinely sorry for everything and tried to console her. Unwittingly, the friendship started again.

Marie didn't have a clue what was going on.

One weekend she returned home to find an empty home and a letter waiting for her. The message was clear. Her husband, David, had traveled out of the country and was not coming back.

Some time later she discovered the real reason for his unannounced departure. He re-united with his first love . . . his ex girlfriend. The news broke her heart. It's hard to say if David chose his ex-girlfriend against his wife from the very moment he ran into her. Experience shows that it doesn't always happen that way. Usually, the man sets out only to exchange pleasantries and ask about other old friends. Most times he reaches out to his ex girlfriend with a desire to help out somehow.

The interaction often relives old memories and emotions, which proves too weighty to ignore. Those memories bring back buried feelings. Before long, they are in love again thereby jeopardizing their relationship with their married partners.

My advice is straight-forward and simple.

If your ex-girlfriend was just an acquaintance or neighbor, let her remain so. If she is someone you had a romantic love relationship with, have nothing to do with her at all.