My fiancee and his deceased wife

by Ellen Johnson
(Ontario, Ca USA)

I am recently engaged to a wonderful man, who was previously married (15 years) to his first wife who passed away from cancer 5 years ago and I know that he loved her very much and he talks about their times together and I am ok with that.

I truly understand he will always love her.

My issue is that he still has pictures in the house from their wedding, and of them together in the living room on walls in the hallway and in the bedroom.

He wants me to move in but now I am questioning that maybe he really isnt ready for a new relationship, should i ask him to take these down or am I being the selfish person here?

Not sure what to do, but I felt that he should put them away maybe keep one out in the bedroom.

CJ

Reply By Samson, True Love Advisor

Have you talked to him about this?

Seems like this is a sensitive issue with him. He is still in love with his wife even though she has passed on. The pictures remind him of the times spent together.

I suspect he will think you're jealous and immature when you discuss this with him. But don't hesistate to have a heart-to-heart talk with him on how you feel about this.

Nevertheless, if he refuses to bulge, don't make it a big deal. Just take the dead wife as the late sister of your man and live with it.

Someday he will take some of them down himself when you become the new mother of the house.

Unfortunately, I can't tell you when.