My Girlfriend wants to make out with other guys

by Jonas
(United Arab Emirates)

I wanted advice on this from people with more experience than a group of 20 year old girls, because I can't seem to agree with what my girlfriend and all her friends find ok.

4 months ago, I met my problem.

From the beginning, we had both said we weren't looking for anything serious, in 3 months we were both going away to separate colleges and neither of us wanted to do long distance.

But we connected at a level neither of us imagined possible. Very long story short, we ended up not being a 3 hour drive apart, but 10 time zones apart.

Ironically, we found ourselves unable to stop talking to each other and we ended up in a long distance relationship without actually calling it an ldr.

During this time I fell in love with her (she had told me she loved me already and still says that)

"Sighs, you've totally and completely won my heart; with every thing you say and everything you do and every way you react to me" -in an email I received this morning.

And until two nights ago, when I thought our relationship was at its strongest point ever. She unveiled what's causing me problems.

1) Two nights ago she made out with someone. Details being, she was drunk, he was in the bathroom over the toilet almost puking (he puked later), he asked her to kiss him like 5-8 times she said no every time, then she called me to ask if she could but I didn't have my phone at the time.

So she got pissed and they made out.

When she told me she made out with a guy I remember feeling disappointed, but when she told me the reasons (or lack of any good reasons IMO) I felt hurt.

I felt it was a copout.

We talked in circles for hours about and before we settled the issue I had to go, but I figured we'd finish it later.

2) Then before we finished our discussion she went out the next night she and did it again.

Anyways we concluded our argument today by deciding that we will be in an open relationship, and we won't share the details of other "partners" with each other.

The thing is I had wanted that 3 weeks ago, but 3 weeks ago I didn't feel the same way I did for her. (Before this)

I don't want to ask her to be exclusive, when we are physically so far apart; I feel that would create extra baggage for us in the long run.

I am totally ok with her trying to meet other guys, im not worried about our love. What bothers me is that she is insistent on going out and making out with guys. She thinks its fun, and she says she doesn't want anything more from it or another man.

Am I wrong to not feel comfortable with that?
Am I just being controlling when it's irrelevant?
Is she being immature?

After she made out with the second guy and before we had solved the problem, I lost a lot of respect for her, and it feels like all those feelings of love, where sucked out of me.

I really want it to work out with her, I see so much potential in her that maybe I just have too high of expectations right now.

Was it unreasonable for me to think she would stop until we solved the problem?

Technically we weren't in a relationship at the time, but that was purely because she didn't want to label it.

I spent more time with her, talking/IMing/Video conferencing than with anyone else in the last month. Am I right to feel hurt after this?

I know I can get over this but I need to know if it's just me being over-sensitive because of the situation i'm in.

(I happened to move to the UAE, and the university is male/female segregated, but they don't tell you that till you get there)